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Equalize Life and Practice

Spoken by Mingyur Rinpoche

Our root guru Kyabje Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche has passed away. When he left us, I was at Nagi Gompa. I felt that he wouldn't die right away. While in India, I received a message that he was seriously ill and so I rushed back to Nepal. During the following month Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche's health had improved and he appeared so much better that I was comforted by the thought that he couldn't possibly leave us all of a sudden like this.

On the day he passed away, I went up to see him earlier in the day. However upon hearing that he was again ill and attended to by the physicians, I didn't go in to his room. Later, during the night of the 23rd of the Tibetan month, he suddenly died.

Now, when looking back, it seems to me that Rinpoche had somehow prepared to depart. He had hurried to arrange and complete various tasks. He had also told me a few things that, in hindsight, indicated that he would soon depart. Anyway, I felt that his death took place far too suddenly and I felt incredibly sad.

In mundane terms, he was my father, but from the spiritual perspective he was my root guru possessing the threefold kindness. Generally, you can distinguish between two types of teachings: Sutra, which includes both Hinayana and Mahayana, and Mantra. On the Hinayana level you regard the guru as a spiritual guide, as a Mahayana follower you perceive him as an emanation of the buddhas. As a Vajrayana practitioner you should see the guru as the embodiment of the very essence of all awakened ones. Based on this you receive the four empowerments through practicing guru yoga, following his command with trust and devotion, and observing the samayas of body, speech and mind. This is a very profound approach and the tantras teach that all the key points of Vajrayana can be condensed into guru devotion. Therefore, in terms of the Dharma, I feel that he was immensely precious and kind.

Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche passed away quite suddenly, but after he died he remained in tukdam for quite a while, longer than the sun was in the sky. There are many different levels of tukdam. Some practitioners can remain in tukdam due to their training in mundane shamatha and vipashyana; some due to proficiency in the visualization practices of the development stage. The length the tukdam lasts also varies; some may last for a month, some for a few weeks, and others a couple of days. Our Rinpoche remained for just over a day. The end of the tukdam was quite amazing; we saw the two types of bodhichitta liquid, both white and red, flow out of his nostrils, something that is said not to happen to just anyone. I felt it was quite extraordinary. Red drops, deep red like blood, appeared from the left nostril, and totally clear liquid, but unlike mucous, came out of the right one. The tantric root texts explain that the red and white bodhichitta will appear from the nostrils of great masters to mark the conclusion of the tukdam and this is what happened.

As for the length of tukdam, it is said that a person who hasn't 'perfected the strength of experience and realization' can sometimes remain for quite a while. On the other hand, someone who has already reached perfection in this doesn't necessarily remain for that long. Our Rinpoche's tukdam didn't last especially long.

It is my general impression that Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche was not only extremely adept in Vajrayana but also especially accomplished in the essential practice of Dzogchen, the Great Perfection. The journey through the Dzogchen path is marked by stages of realization, each having a certain name, and I have the trust that Rinpoche had reached quite a high level.

Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche himself, though, never spoke of his realization; he lived very humbly, in the style of a hidden yogi. He always praised other masters while avoiding any mention of himself.

It is often said that one cannot really judge the depth of realization of an emanation of the buddhas and bodhisattvas solely from his or her behavior. If we don't reflect deeply in our hearts then even the Buddha can be seen as just another human being; looking like ourselves. In fact, there were even some people who perceived the Buddha as being ugly. Our impression and experience of someone are often colored by our mistaken ways of perceiving. On the other hand, someone with pure, unmistaken perception would see the Buddha as a pure divine being. Personally, I trust that Rinpoche was a deeply realized being. I have heard that both Kyabje Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche and also Nyoshul Khen Rinpoche said that our Rinpoche wasn't an ordinary person, but someone who had reached the level of realization called 'culmination of awareness.'

As Rinpoche's disciples and followers, especially now, we should try our best to be in harmony and avoid misunderstandings. The most essential thing is to focus on the instruction we received from him, and persevere in our practice. This is the best way to offer him our service and to fulfill his wishes.

In general all things are impermanent; you really cannot find any single thing that lasts and can be relied on. Any material thing that comes into being, no matter how fine and costly, will perish; it is only a matter of time. There is nothing of lasting substance in this world. The only thing in which we can find lasting value is the practice of the sacred Dharma, and your accomplishment in practice will surely help you find happiness in both this and in following lives.

After your teacher's passing, you cannot help but remember him. Please use this vivid memory to remind you of his instructions, of looking into the nature of your mind. We should try our best to mingle our mind with his and let be in equanimity. Honestly, the guru's awakened state is already inseparable from our basic nature. Seen from the perspective of ultimate truth, our minds are in essence indivisible. This is a reality we need to perceive; we need to "know this to be as it is." Unless this becomes part of our direct experience, the fact of our indivisible nature will not help us. The outcome of practice results from training in this, from making use of the actual experience of this fact.

Please see it like this: the guru's mind is empty; our minds are empty too. The guru's mind is cognizant; our minds are cognizant as well. In the guru's mind these two qualities are an indivisible unity; in our minds they are equally an indivisible unity. The very moment you acknowledge the reality of this, then your mind is said to have mingled with and be indivisible from the guru's mind.

It is said that all buddhas are identical in essence. When appearing in order to influence sentient beings, they are perceived in all possible ways, some peaceful, some wrathful. They may be seen by sentient beings in all these various ways, but in essence they are still identical.

The awakened state holds no notion of 'I and them." For instance, the principal yidam deities of the Nyingma school of Secret Mantra are known as Kabgye, Gongdu and Phurpa. It sometimes happens that while a practitioner is realizing them through sadhana practice, that he or she will have a vision of a yidam deity of the Sarma schools such as Gyalwa Gyamtso, Chakrasamvara or Vajra Varahi. It also happens that someone supplicating Padmasambhava will have a vision of and receive blessings from Buddha Shakyamuni. This is because all buddhas are identical in essence. One doesn't have to abandon one yidam in order to accomplish another. All the tantras agree on this.

In addition to mingling our minds with the guru, it is of vital importance to keep your samayas pure. We practitioners should make sure that our precious link to Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche does not get damaged or broken.

After Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche passed away, the sky was incredibly clear for a couple of days. There wasn't a single cloud. Among the various signs that accompany the death of a great master, the tantras mention that the most eminent is a cloudless sky. Vajrayana practices fall into two main categories, those with and those without attributes, development and completion stages. After the passing of a master who had focused on practice with attributes there may be visible signs such as rainbows, sounds and various relics known as dung and ringsel. But, the Dzogchen tantras say that, a master whose main practice was beyond attributes will show no other sign but a clear sky. The tantras of both the Sarma and Nyingma traditions agree on this. So I feel that Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche's death being accompanied by an unusually clear sky with brilliant sunshine is a most amazing sign.

Though at first, I was heart-broken and miserable, later, upon remembering his instructions and the advice he had given, I felt that all things are unavoidably impermanent and it won't help to hold on painfully. Rather, when letting be into the equanimity in which the guru's mind and one's own are indivisible, you can be totally inseparable from him. In this way, while supplicating him it makes no difference where you are, or whether or not the guru has passed away, you will still receive his blessings. It doesn't happen that his blessings are greater when he is alive and diminish after he passes away. Anyway, that's how I understand it.

Also, please remember that it is not only our Rinpoche who passed away; everyone does, even Buddha Shakyamuni didn't remain.

The main task ahead for us is nothing other than continuing to keep his instructions in mind, applying them, and training in the meditation he taught. Without undergoing the training, we leave this life alone, unaccompanied by any of our possessions, even if we are a worldly king with enormous wealth and luxuries. At that moment none of our possessions can help us in any way whatsoever. We cannot take them along, not even as much as a mote of dust. When the spirit leaves the body, nothing sticks, like pulling a hair out of butter. In that situation - alone, unprotected and defenseless - what can help us other than the Dharma practice we did?

From this perspective it is so important not to give in to our tendencies of being lazy or postponing practice until tomorrow, next month or next year. While thinking, "I'll practice tomorrow or the next day," life runs out and one day it's time to die. In death our only support is our personal practice, so remember this: shorten your plans and projects. It is much better to think, "I may die soon anyway, so what's the use of planning to do all these tasks. If I don't practice now, the day will come when I'll be sorry."

By not projecting plans and involvements very far into the future, we are able to practice full time, like Milarepa who said, "There is no end to worldly pursuits; they only end when you stop." As long as we are involved in all of kinds of actions and dealings, they never end. The only way is to make a clean break, discontinuing all these preoccupations. While caught up in our projects, doing this and that, one thing after the other, we may feel, "I better do this! Then I will do such and such! That is what will improve my whole situation!" Striving to score small successes in this way, we disguise the fact that we are just being lazy.

It would be much better to just make up our minds, sincerely and decisively, by acknowledging that our minds are fickle and appearances are seductive. It won't do to simply continue in our present fashion. These days we still have incredibly precious instructions at hand which, when applied, enable us to awaken to true and complete enlightenment within this same body and life. Nevertheless, since most of us spend our time in indolence and pointless activities, ignoring the importance of genuine practice, there are only a few truly accomplished masters.

On the other hand, someone who practices wholeheartedly can be enlightened in a single lifetime; there is definitely no doubt about that. If you can just apply yourself to the practice in an authentic way while in retreat for three years, it is taught that you can reach the level known as 'seeing the innate nature in actuality.' We still possess these extremely precious instructions. Keeping this in mind, I wish to spend the rest of my life focused on meditation practice. I feel that I must really 'equalize life and practice.' This is the deep wish that has sprung up in my heart. Doing so, I feel, is what will fulfill Rinpoche's wishes, and it is also what will be of greatest benefit for all sentient beings.

There is no end to sentient beings; they are infinite in number, like space is infinite. You will always have the chance to benefit beings, whenever you feel ready to do so, on a small or large scale.

I would like to say this to Rinpoche's disciples and followers around the world: Now that our guru has passed away, don't just sit around being depressed. Remember his instructions and try to fulfill his wishes. Make supplications, mingle your minds with his, and remain in equanimity. In accordance with your individual capacities, try your best to continue practicing what he taught you as much as you are able.

It is best if you can equalize life and practice That means cast away all worldly involvements out of deep-felt renunciation for all of samsara. Furthermore, trust in the Three Jewels, have sincere confidence in the consequences of karmic deeds, and the reality of past and future lives. If you can practice in this way your mind will be indivisible from the guru's and within this lifetime, you will be able to 'capture the royal throne of the primordially pure Great Perfection.'

The next best is to act in a truthful and honest way, to live in accordance with spiritual principles. From time to time, take the opportunity to practice more intensively in a retreat situation. You can alternate in this way.

At least, you should try to remember what your guru told you, as often as possible, be truthful and honest in whatever you do. Keep a good heart and regularly try to do things that are helpful to others. Cultivate the attitudes of love and compassion. Be gentle and kind. And make supplications to the guru.

Any of these modes of living will please your guru and, if you do not reach enlightenment in this very life, then you will either at the moment of death or in the bardo. At least you are assured the attainment of buddhahood in one of your future lives. In short, one way or another, you are not far away from the omniscient state of a buddha.

In essence an enlightened master remains unchanged. The aging, falling sick and passing away, exists mainly in our experience. It is mainly a drama played out for us, taking place in our minds, whereas these events have no tangible substance in his experience. Whether he is dead or alive, the natural face of his awareness remains unchanged. This is not evident to people like us. We look at him and see him as just a human being; he needs to eat, we also need to eat. He moves about, we also move about. He needs to go to the toilet, we also need to go. So aren't we the same?

No, we aren't. In Rinpoche's experience, his identity is not made out of a material body of flesh and blood. This is hard to understand for ordinary people like myself. But actually, that's how it is. If we train ourselves in devotion, while deeply trusting that this is his real nature, then there is no doubt that we will receive his blessings. From this angle, the vital point is to have trust in and devotion for your guru.

In addition, when you gain full confidence in the consequences of karmic actions, then you cannot possibly avoid wanting to practice with perseverance. Without this trust in karma and rebirth, it is easy to become doubtful about the value of spiritual practice. Then no matter how much practice you try to do it will only end up leading in the wrong direction. So please gain confidence in the law of karma.

How do we gain such trust? First of all, our truly and perfectly enlightened Buddha did teach about the consequences of karmic actions. He taught that events and phenomena take place in ways we can perceive directly or infer, and in ways that are obvious, hidden, or totally hidden. Direct perception is what ordinary people like ourselves experience through our five senses - seeing, hearing, tasting, smelling and touching. Hidden phenomena are what take place out of the reach of our direct sense experience.

Still we can understand the experience of phenomena based on some sign through which we can infer or conclude a causal relationship. In philosophy this is how we reason that something is empty of a concrete identity, and how we can reason sufficiently to establish the fact that all things never really come into existence. Any normal person uses this same principle of inference; for instance, when seeing smoke we can infer with certainty that there must be fire below. The fire is not seen, heard, tasted, smelled or felt, but still we can be certain that there is fire. This is how we can establish certainty that all things are emptiness.

The Buddha taught that karma and rebirth are hidden phenomena. Therefore they are not evident nor something we can perceive directly. In addition to the five senses, we have a sixth, the capacity of mind. If you want to bring karma and rebirth within the reach of your mental capacity, you need to be clairvoyant. Clairvoyance is of two types: conditioned and unconditioned. Conditioned clairvoyance can be obstructed in various ways and therefore some things remain out of reach. Some people, whether Buddhists or non-Buddhists, have the ability to perceive where other beings take rebirth and can also read other people's thoughts, often to amazing degrees, even when it takes place far away. Due to some karmic reason there are also things they cannot perceive.

Noble bodhisattvas on the higher levels of realization, the bhumis, possess some level of unconditioned clairvoyance. True unconditioned clairvoyance is only present in the mind of a buddha, and that is the only way to have totally unimpeded perception of karma and rebirth. People like ourselves cannot perceive directly. But if something is out of our reach, does that necessarily mean that it doesn't exist? No it doesn't. Therefore, the Buddha gave us some tools of reasoning to enable us to establish certainty about the reality of past and future lives.

Everyone can agree that rice sprouts from planting rice seeds; this can be verified by everyone's direct experience. Also nothing other than barley can grow from a barley grain. This is simply the nature of things. Within this perspective, when you inquire into what this perceiving mind really is, you find that it is something entirely different. Mind has no physical form, nor is it like immaterial space. It has a different nature.

Apart from mind nothing can be the cause of mind or produce a moment of consciousness. When we try to find the primeval cause of mind, there is no 'first' cause to find. As you go back through each preceding moment, you can reasonably conclude that mind is beginningless. Once you convince yourself that consciousness has no beginning, then it is possible to feel confident about the existence of past lives and consequently of future lives as well.

When I was young I spent years learning and training. After my first year of studies I had gained a certain level of education, and if I continue until I have studied for 30 years I will be regarded as being quite learned. If we continue learning and training until the end of our life, then our knowledge will increase correspondingly. From this viewpoint, if we have trained in emptiness through many lives already, then this training does progress, and it continues to develop until the final perfection at the level of buddhahood.

Also it is impossible for mind, or a moment of consciousness, to be without a cause; just as it is impossible to have a crop without seed. Without a cause, mind would be either totally and forever nonexistent like space, or forever existent as a fixed entity. Reasoning in these ways we can gain some confidence about karma and rebirth. If positive, the karma we create leads towards the higher realms and enlightenment, and, if negative, towards the lower realms. This is an unfailing law of consequence.

Once we recognize the nature of mind and realize it in actuality, then from that perspective it becomes evident that this nature is not subject to karmic consequences, has no physical form, sound, smell, taste or texture, and doesn't arise, dwell or cease. In short, it has a quality of being perfectly and primordially pure. By simply relaxing into this state, you will gradually perfect its strength and attain stability, and finally, when reaching buddhahood, you are truly beyond karma, beyond benefit and harm. At that point all suffering is permanently depleted, and you have arrived at the citadel of immortality. This is the attainment of the mahasukhakaya, the body of great bliss. This bliss is unlike the ordinary sensation of pleasure, which is conditioned and fleeting; this great bliss is inconceivable and unending. At the same time, buddhahood has the quality of total omniscience, excluding not even a speck of dust.

Even though space is endless and the number of sentient beings is infinite, the omniscient knowledge of a buddha sees their life-spans, deeds and attitudes in completeness. It is like knowing every single leaf on all the trees in the world. While perceiving all these states of mind, a buddha holds no conceptual thoughts. That's the kind of attainment we can reach if we practice. It's called the inconceivable nature.

Please keep these points in mind. Continue your practice, at best by equalizing life and practice. Next best is to live in accordance with the Dharma. In the very least, give your assistance to spiritual endeavors, help in the teaching of the Dharma and in the maintenance of Rinpoche's monasteries. In this way, do what is meaningful in preserving the Buddhadharma and brings benefit to all beings.

Thank you very much.